I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
