what day is it and did you see me today?
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
