I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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