i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
