Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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