I'm drive I can fine osifer
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
