I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
