i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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