I got chris browned last night
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
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