It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
