I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
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