I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
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