It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Randomize
