i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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