I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
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