Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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