can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
