i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Randomize
