yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
