Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
