Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize
