yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
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