Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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