that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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