I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
