i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize