Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
