I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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