So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
