worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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