I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
