i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Randomize