you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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