i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Barsexuality is the new black.
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
