Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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