Fuck appropriateness.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Randomize