I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
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