its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Randomize
