i may or may not be watching the land before time
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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