If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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