Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
