I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Randomize
