I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Randomize
