how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
