Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
No...this little piggys going to the bar
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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