the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
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