I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
