it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
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