and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Randomize
