Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
